I’m so thankful God gave me an analogy about training kids from the point of view as an actress! I was in acting for 7 years in school so I can definitely relate to acting!
So when an actor gets a script, the actor must study his lines and all the scenes then he must rehearse with everyone to get all of his lines right.
But if an actor is just handed a script and then told to get on stage for the real live performance he would fail every time. He would feel unsure of himself. It would be chaos. And if the director came on the stage during the performance to tell everyone what to do the actors would feel angry that she is interrupting them and embarrassing them in front of the audience. The director would look like a fool.
It’s a little bit like that when I haven’t trained my kids in a certain area and then expect them to perform at the level that I think they should perform at especially in front of people. I have felt like that crazy director before who is coming on stage acting like a fool and no one is listening. And actually feel ignored and cast off to the side as if I have no authority at all. It’s a horrible feeling actually.
Now I know how important it is to make a note of what my kids need more training in and then actually take time out of our day to have a “rehearsal!” One area is at night when mommy or daddy read the Bible story there is always chaos. So we need to go over what everyone is supposed to do and if they don’t do it, they will get a consequence or spanking. But I want to actually act it out with them and do a role play so they really get it. Then when it is actually night time and they don’t obey, they won’t be angry when we immediately give them a spanking, because they know what is expected of them. It’s easier for them to say they are sorry with a good heart.
These are some areas we need to have some “rehearsals”:
- Reading Bible story at night as a family
- When I’m talking to them or giving them instructions or orders for them to not walk away from me right in the middle of my talk.
- When I give them a command like, “Please eat over the table.” They usually say, “I am!” Instead I need them to just say, “Yes maam.” This is teaching them to honor authority.
- When any adult asks them a question to never ignore them and be silent. But to look at the adult and answer.
- To not be demanding when asking for something. To always say please can you …. or I cannot help them or answer them until they say it right.
- They need to learn to not give me their trash. They treat me like their trash can a lot. To be responsible to find a trash can or hold onto it until they find a trash can!
- When I say “Come here!” for them to start walking towards me or it is an immediate spanking. If they want to do something else they have to start obeying then ask me to do something instead of coming here.
- Not getting up from the kitchen table unless they ask to be excused.
- To take their plate or bowl to the sink when they are excused.
- When I’m on the phone what are they supposed to do? Teach them to wait until I’m off the phone or sit near me and write on a paper what they need and wait for me to respond without yelling or whining.
- No more jumping on couches or beds.
- When I tell them the schedule for the day they usually whine or complain. This can no longer happen. I must train them to smile and be happy. To be content in life itself. Or if it relates to me telling them to come inside for now it is homework or dinner or anything, they cannot complain and whine! It’s not going to be acceptable anymore.
- Manipulation and Lying to be stopped and have consequences.
- To not show or have any attitude when I read a Bible verse or make them write down a verse.
- When in a restaurant to not run and to have manners at the table and with people.
I might work on 1 thing per week and train a lot to make it clear for them!
Thank you Lord for your help!